By Sam Blend
You’re on a date. At some restaurant. When suddenly you realize that you just aren’t that into it and hope to never have to see that person again.
Now you start wondering like Jerry:
“What do you do at the end of a date when you know you don’t want to see this person ever again, for the rest of your life? What do you say… No matter what you say, it’s a lie. ‘I’ll see you around.’ See you around. If you’re around, and I’m around, I’ll see you around that area. You won’t be around me. But you will be around. ‘Take care now.’”
It’s a very tough situation. You don’t want to hurt this person’s feelings, but you really don’t want to stick yourself in the situation of going on another date with them again.
Sometimes the other person also feels that they don’t click with you, or they’ve picked up on your signals that you don’t want to continue seeing them. In that case, you’re in the clear, and it can come to a mutual ending.
Other times, the person is completely unaware of any of this and really wants to go on another date. From the many breakups we witness on Seinfeld, I think that the best way a character on the show approaches the situation is by starting off and saying something along the lines of “This isn’t working for me” or “I don’t think this is going to work”.
If you say something like that, you better be prepared for the question “Why?” and a reason to back your statement up. Anything from “I just have a lot going on right now” to “I don’t really feel like we click”.
Or you could say something like what Jerry was saying, “I’ll see you around” or “Take care now.” Those phrases, and others like them, are incredibly unromantic and off-putting. They are a big signal that you don’t feel like it’s working, but you don’t actually come out and say it.
It’s never a good idea to lie. Don’t tell somebody “let’s do this again” or “I’ll give you a call” if you don’t plan on doing either. Don’t think like Jerry when he says:
“Alright, I said I had a good time and I’d call, but who takes that literally?”
A lot of people take that literally. You don’t have to say you had an awful time, but if you didn’t have a good time, it’s best to not say anything at all.
It’s also important to be able to pick up on these signs to know when somebody doesn’t want to see you again. Did they avoid making follow up plans? Are they not calling/not returning your calls? Have you tried texting them with no luck? Stop trying! It’s going to be a waste of time.
Yes, it’s preferable for somebody to be straight up with you, but many people are not, and it’s good for your mental health to know when to move on.
Samantha Blend is a second year English major and a blogger for O&B, writing about life lessons she has learned from Seinfeld. Her posts appear on Fridays.